Here we go again, another ending, another closure, and with those things another beginning. I want to say at the outset that I'm sorry and I'm not sorry. There are things outside of the control of any of us, and brain on fire Richard is not the whole story. A facet, maybe, of the ruby that over Halloween, in isolation in an emergency department, I imagined to be the only source of light in a subterranean chamber where an evil wizard was entombed to insure life on earth with anaerobic reproduction should a cataclysm destroy the rest of us. I hope that such a thing at least holds off until I die of natural causes. I hope I die of natural causes. Up and down and up and down for how many years now. Can't a fellow at least one of these days get some rest? Get feet on solid ground or at least evolve sea legs, ride the swells and stay away from the rocks where the sirens sing out like cop cars on highways, on their way to serve and protect us from ourselves. Forget that I said it.

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Grasshopper Diary

Month the Thirty-Fourth

1.12.26 From the middle of January Oh what a month it has been. Truly more than a month since my last entry. Busy busy busy, as a bee in the heart of spring. I see all the flowers at the florist and think maybe I should get a bouquet for my love. It is an easy gesture if an expensive one, but I don’t mind the money. In fact today seems much brighter than yesterday if it is a grey and gloomy day outside. There I go again writing about the weather, as if any of you cared about

6 days ago10 min read

Month the Thirty-Third

11.24.25 Nearly 4 O’clock on a Monday It is one of those days, another one of those days when the skin seems to crawl in its jonesing for a smoke. But we will be strong and forget how we used to cope with this feeling. Instead we will have a high noon (sip it slowly, Richard) and a glass of water to quell the shakes. We will look at the cedar trees in the neighboring yard and smile at the way they have not shed their robes as all their deciduous fellows. There it is, the repe

6 days ago8 min read

Month the Thirty-Twoothe

10.23.25 Alone for the weekend The world is upside down, baby is on a private jet bound for North Carolina and I am here in the P waiting for her to return. Of course I will have some engagements in the meantime, firstly the double shift I will be working today until who knows when. Hopefully time for a telephone call home though that home will be some hundreds of miles away. For now it is a breakfast sandwich and a double espresso, a lonely heart and an hour to kill. How man

6 days ago16 min read

ABOUT ME

There isn't that much to say about me honestly, and the posts will do a much better job of introducing me, but here goes nothing: I have no credentials to speak of, cannot claim any authority on matters spiritual or otherwise, but I believe that honest meditation before the blank page is one means to stay sane in the face of a bleak and at times unforgiving world, and maybe provide some light for someone else too.

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Book Picks

Pardon the grainy image, but Bolaño's globetrotting novel rooted in northern Mexico is perhaps my favorite modern novel. The sheer scale (900+ pages in English) of the book demands that you take it seriously, and it is surely serious, as the numerical title is, I believe, a body count. 2666 murders, the story goes. And yet it reaches back into WWII, continuing the studies of Naziism that are a major throughline in Roberto's oeuvre. Anyways, maybe my favorite novel ever, overall.

10/10 would recommend.

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